Birds And Burgers

Birds are dying, all across the land; birds being cut down in their prime. Baby birds, teenaged birds, it makes no difference – they are all being battered into sad and feathery piles of pulp.

Of course, for most birds, this is nothing new. Birds have been slaughtered every day for years, piles and piles of them. But of course those birds are happy to die, because it is done secretly in a nice, friendly, mechanical way; and because they will be turned into Kentucky Fried Chicken or something tasty and similar.

The people most upset about the plight of these poor feathered friends are the people who “love” animals. They hate to see any harm befall an animal that they personally will not eat.

I have no problem with people “loving” animals – as long as it is done in a safe way, with the proper lubricants, where I can’t see it. But I do have a problem with people who “love” animals and still eat them. Dog owners are particularly good at this. They cannot bear to see a little pooch in pain, and sign petitions about the evil Koreans who eat cute little puppy-dogs. But they will happily sit down to a great slab of beef or a coil of sausages and think nothing about it.

I would not really be believed if I claimed to love children while chomping on a toddler-burger; or if I said I loved women while I was in court for slapping my girlfriend around. So how do meat-eating animal lovers get away with it?

Yes, I am mostly vegetarian, but why does that make my agreement less valid? And anyway, I don’t claim to “love” animals, because I have not met them all, and I am sure I could find a tree-beetle somewhere that I would not get on with. And dogs…well, don’t get me started on dogs.

Summary – eat whatever the hell you want, but if you eat animals, then you don’t love them. Simple, isn’t it?

/ paddy


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