Tonight a ferocious storm raged over Stockholm, a swirling mass of unprecedented brutality going by the terrifying name of…Per. Yes sir, storm Per (translation: Storm Boring) croaked past our windows, gave the cats a few nightmares and bent our trees in a slightly aggressive manner. It had left a fairly decent trail of destruction across southern Sweden, tearing the roofs from at least 4(!) buildings, causing the trains to be cancelled and sloshing the sea-water about impressively, but by the time it reached us it seemed to have lost its oomph.
To be fair to Storm Boring, real damage was actually done in other places. A few people did die from falling stuff and a few hundred thousand houses in the wilds are without electricity. The Swedish TV News considered this last item to be very newsworthy and gave us an emotional human-interest live transmission from a house somewhere in Sweden where the people had NO POWER. Oh, the hardship…the humanity. So there they sat, gathered morosely around their candles, while the kids grinned ecstatically in the background, and the reporter built up to his first question.
And then, a minute into this heart-rending interview, the power suddenly comes back on. Yes indeed, the lights in the kitchen flickered to life and the reporter, who had not prepared any other questions, had to soldier on with his original ones which were by now not very relevant. And to make things worse, some deafening alarm was peeping away in the background, which the family made no effort to turn off, and the cosy candles were looking a bit sad in the full glare of 200 watts of light. Live TV, eh?
Anyway, I sat on my sofa for hours waiting for this ferocious monster to rip across my neighbourhood and leave begind a trail of easily-fixed destruction. But, apart from a little whining and the odd rattle, nothing has happened as of yet. Typical – we never get the good storms, the Danes and the country people always steal them. Ah well, I’ll just settle down and wait for Storm Fluffy and Storm Cuddly Bunny, which are surely due any day now.