Cigg-a-licious

Here’s a little something I borrowed from Orlaith’s blog: cigarettes in Ireland will no longer be available in small packs (meaning 10) but only in 20s. The reasoning behind this is that kids will be less inclined to smoke.

Aha, more powerful thinking by the penises in charge! In fact they pulled the same trick in Sweden a few years back. One day there were suddenly no 10 packs in the shops. And I, a very occasional smoker, was forced to buy a pack of 20 when I only wanted a pack of 10 (well, I really only wanted 2).

So let’s summarise that, shall we: in an attempt to make me cut down on smoking, the state has encouraged me to buy even more cigarettes. Does this make any sense in any reality?

For fuck’s sake, it’s not like there could be any real economic reason behind this: the kids these days have more money than I do. And on top of this, they can do basic addition. There we are, teaching the kids maths in school and yet we don’t suppose they will apply it to a real-life problem such as: “I want fags, Timmy wants fags, fags may be purchased and divided into two lots. Now, how do I get me fags?”

In fact, all you are really doing with this law is ensuring that kids that smoke will become better friends with other friends that smoke. A win-win situation for creating new indie bands, but perhaps not the goal originally in mind.

And while on the subject, can we please drop all the anti-cigarette advertising that tries to tell us that “smoking is not cool”. Excuse me? An activity that may kill you, that society practically forbids you to do? How can it NOT be cool?

Smoking defines cool. If you ask the kids to pack in the cigs, then try arguments such as: “You will taste like an old pub and nobody will snog you”; “Your clothes will stink for days”; “Your teeth will go all brown”; “You will be crap at sports”; “Your skin and teeth will be all wrinkly”; “You may, or may not, die earlier than expected”. There’s loads of fine, usable arguments, so please mention those and not the whiny, pathetic “Oh, smoking isn’t coooool, kiddies!”.

And, pray tell me, what IS cool then? Wearing Nike? Saying your prayers? Eating your veg and prancing about on a football field like a smarmy dick? Oh just gimme the fucking fags.

/ paddy

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2 thoughts on “Cigg-a-licious

  1. ullis: These gay gentlemen that you mention – can they cook, or will it just be for the sex? Ah, it doesn’t matter…send them on over!

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