I’ve been a bit quiet the last week. This has been because of my five days at OCD camp, as mentioned, but also because of some serious turmoil in my private life.
Basically my girlfriend, having lived with me for 2 years, has moved out. This has been on the cards for a while, so it wasn’t very surprising, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t hard. Too much anxiety for one week, I can tell you.
M, when she moved in, had a very rosy image of how it is to live with somebody. I had done it before and my experiences were not quite so rosy. However it was a choice between inviting her to move in or losing her, so move in she did.
Now after 2 years of trying to adapt to living with not only a boyfriend but also half time with his kid, she has done the only thing she felt she could do. Suddenly I have gaping empty closets, too many bathroom lockers, and a bed with a large space in it.
Still, it’s now 100% my place again and if I want to paint the kitchen green, then nobody can raise a finger in protest. Unfortunately it’s also 100% my rent again, meaning I can’t really work part-time much longer. So I have lots more space, but less time in which to enjoy it.
As regards M, all we can do now is wait and see what happens. We still care for each other but if it wasn’t meant to work, then we will call it a day and wander off in different direction, older, wiser and (on my part) considerably poorer.
Whatever happens I’m sure it’s all for the best.