I like women’s clothes. I like it mostly when there are women inside them, but I also like putting them on. At least some of them. Specifically the socks. And particularly the stripy ones.
Let me explain: men’s clothes, you see, are boring. Soul-destroying. Women get all the fun stuff – they can even wear men’s clothes and completely get away with it, sort of like Patrick Swayze did in Point Break. And in Sweden, where men are unnaturally tall, my choice of clothes is even more limited and I find myself very often wandering about the ladies section to find things that will fit me.
It’s not that I try on skirts and panties and things, although I do have a few shirts at home that were made for “ladies” because men’s shirts look like huge big sacks on me.
But then we have the socks. Oooooh…the socks.
Men’s socks are crap. Black, or brown, or grey with maybe a few fucking diamonds on them. Women’s sock are colourful and exciting. And so I started buying women’s socks, mainly for the colours – and then I moved onto the stripes. And now I am a fully-fledged stripy sock addict.
I don’t what it is about them, but if I don’t have a pair of stripy socks on when I leave the house, I don’t feel like a complete woman. No wait – I meant man. Or did I..?