I just love it to bits, I really do. Who needs funny material when the religious idiots of the world are just pumping it out for free?
Yes ladies and gentlemen, it’s the Jesus and Mary Pancake! As you can read in this article, the fabulously eloquent Marilyn Smith found this convincing (snigger) image of the holy couple in her breakfast. To let the good lady herself explain it in her own words :
“I saw what looked like, possibly, what people may imagine Jesus would look like, or Moses.”
Indeed. Or possibly Chuck Norris holding a candy floss. Or a pair of unemployed ninjas.
Normally I would say that, yes, the human brain is predisposed to recognising faces and human forms in random patterns, but on this occasion no amount of squinting brings out the supposed sacred visage of the bearded one.
In fact a little image juggling has given me a different interpretation:
As we can see in Image 1, on the left, the pattern clearly depicts Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, fleeing the Bolivian army.
And now, rotated 90 degrees, Image 2 is quite obviously the Millennium Falcon on its way to murder thousands of innocent Death Star welders, plumbers and graphic designers.
And finally the clincher: image 3 can be nothing other than the master of retro video-gaming, the one, the only, the totally incomprehensible… Q*bert! Yes the retro gamers of the world are at this moment scrabbling to purchase this rare edible image to add to their swelling and rather pointless collections.
If you have any biscuits or items of clothing that look like a holy person, you too can CASH IN and make BIG BUCKS by slapping the piece of crap up on eBay and getting some confused individual to shell out big bucks for it.
Come to think of it, I have a semen stain on my pillow that looks rather like Moses delivering oral pleasure to Herod. Let me just grab my camera and I’ll get right back to you…